• emily southwind

"Great Perhaps"

Let’s start with an unconventional intro, shall we?

In my last year of high school, all of the seniors were allowed to paint a brick in whatever (appropriate) way we wanted to. It took me all year to find out what exactly I wanted to put. I wanted to leave something that was meaningful to me. Something that made sense to me. I had just finished reading my favourite book, Looking for Alaska by John Green, for the third time over and it clicked. My brick wasn’t inspiring to anyone other than me and it wasn’t an homage to the years I spent in high school - which most people did. There were music notes, jersey numbers, friend hand prints scattered across the wall. That just wasn't me.

I sat down, painted an all white background with black letters poorly painted on the brick;

I go to seek a great perhaps.

It is said that before Francois Rabelais, a famous writer/scholar, died, that is what he said. His famous last words.

It is said that before Francios Rablais, a famous writer/scholar, died, that is what he said. His famous last words.

One of the main characters in Looking for Alaska, Miles Halter heads to a boarding school to seek his great perhaps. He says, “That’s why I’m going. So I don’t have to wait until I die to start seeking a Great Perhaps.” Me too, Pudge, me too.

Great Perhaps; when one has come to peace with oneself.

I ran from my home so I could find the peace that I was looking for. I thought peace was found in materialistic things like friends, money, alcohol. Yes, naive and silly.

Peace is something we all strive for in our lives. Whether that is ignoring the news, hanging out with friends and family to ignore the way the world is turning, or simply turning your phone off because you have the privilege to.

Peace for me is remembering God is with me through every step of my life on Earth. Peace is also justice when things are unjust. Peace is trying to understand things that don’t make sense to me. Peace for me is having a space where I can be who I am and say the things and tell the stories I’ve wanted to for so long. I can name off many things, but those are the ones that are important in this moment.

So, here I am. Seeking the Great Perhaps.

I intend to tell my story and the story of others in this space. Stories of family, love, life, accomplishments and of course, food. But I want you guys to know that this will be a space that touches on grief, racism, politics. If that’s not your thing, that’s okay, but ask yourself why.

If you've come this far, thank you. I can’t wait to connect. Until next time.

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